Story #9

 Ninth story

There are a few more moment of my life because of which I can feel ashamed.

Our apartment had one room, a kitchen, a hallway, a toilet and a bathroom. Opposite exit of the apartment there was a door to the bathroom and a little to the right was a toilet. To the right was a corridor to the kitchen and  perpendicular to the entrance to the only room. The light switch was on the wall to the left of the bathroom entrance and to the right of the toilet. The first is the lighting of the hallway and  the second is the lighting of the bathroom,  toilet and kitchen. The light switch in the hallway had a simple mechanism and was easy to disassemble. One day, I got mad at my little sister and took this switch apart so that if anyone touched it that, the button housing would fall off. I don't remember why I did it. But when my sister came out of the bathroom, she hit the switch and got electrocuted. It was only half a second, but I didn't expect it.

One day, I got angry at my first sister and I threw a crochet hook at her. The hook got stuck in the scalp. It was scary. After that moment, I decided to control myself, it seemed to me that I could harm the people around me.

When I was in the third grade, my classmate and I got into a fight. More precisely, other classmates incited him to beat me. It's funny, I remember his last name - VinogradovI was able to throw him on the floor and stepped on him with my foot. At first, I felt pride; it was my first victory. But it was the only victory of the two real fights I've ever had.

There was a boy at school who bullied me and my sisters. I can't remember where and when, but I bought a penknife and carried it with me. One day, before gym class I was talking to him in the school locker room and he said something rude, I got angry, took out a knife and wanted to stab him in the body. He took the knife from me and left.

This note is not about shame, but rather about our values when we were children. Once upon a time i had a beautiful toy - a fox with glasses. There was a metal wire in his paws. I could bend his paws so that he would sit or stand or wave his paw. I remember that I really liked this toy. But in the second grade I took it  to school with me along with other toys and sold it. My classmate bought this toy very quickly for next to nothing. I still remember this toy, only in fragments of memories, but they are there....

 today, I saw a dream.

I and unknow person were preparing for death. We knew was our last day. Someone gave us a special injection to ease the transition to the afterlife. But my companion disappeared in the middle of the day and I realized this wasn't my last day.